It Passes and We Stay
A Light exists in Spring
Not present on the Year
At any other periodâ
When March is scarcely hereA Color stands abroad
On Solitary Fields
That Science cannot overtake
But Human Nature feels.It waits upon the Lawn,
It shows the furthest Tree
Upon the furthest Slope you know
It almost speaks to thee.Then as Horizons step
Or Noons report away
Without the Formula of sound
It passes and we stayâ
A quality of loss
Emily Dickinson
Affecting our Content
As Trade had suddenly encroached
Upon a Sacrament.
The double parashiyot of Tazria and Metzora are devoted in their entireties to the Biblical notion of tumah, usually translated as âimpurity.â In them, we learn three of the major sources of tumah: childbirth (); a condition known as łŮłú˛š°ů˛šâałŮ, which can manifest on skin, clothing, or the walls of oneâs house (); and bodily secretions (). The two other primary sources of tumah are touching or carrying the carcasses of certain animals () and contact with a human corpse ().
But what is the essential nature of tumah, and what does it have to do with Emily Dickinsonâs poem? The great Hasidic master Rabbi Menachem Mendl of Kotzk (1787â1859) offers an especially beautiful reading.
The Kotzkerâs teaching is based on a Talmudic passage, from the beginning of masekhet , identifying three phenomena which God attends to âpersonally,â without resort to an intermediary:
Rabbi Yohanan said: Three keys remain in the Holy Blessed Oneâs own hand, and have not been entrusted to any messenger, namely, the key of rain, the key of childbirth, and the key of the revival of the dead . . .
Seizing upon this notion, the Kotzker says that at the moment when a woman is giving birth, God is present in an intensified, heightened wayâin the Kotzkerâs language, âhigher holiness rests there.â He continues:
But afterwards, when the infant emerges into the atmosphere of the world, automatically the Shekhinah and incumbent holiness withdraw. And therefore, in this place, tumah âis born.â Because everywhere where there is a withdrawal of holiness, tumah is born in its place, as in the tumah associated with death, which arises for the same reason.
(Ohel Torah, Parashat Tazria)
Here, the forms of tumah associated with human birth and death are a spiritual condition arising in the aftermath of a particularly intense encounter with the Divine. Note that this is not a state of unusual distance from God (and certainly not a complete absence of God, as no place is devoid of the Divine); rather, itâs an experience of relative distance, a reduction to ânormalâ levels of holiness and Godliness. Tumah is the psycho-spiritual let-down after a heightened experience of holiness, which in turn creates a vulnerabilityâ perhaps to negativity or sin, or disaffection or doubt.
This magnificent reading points well beyond literal birth and death and the biblical category of tumah. Liminal moments of many kinds are often accompanied by an intensified experience of Godâs presence, or a heightened sense of vitality and meaning. This is true whether the moment is predominantly joyful or sad (as births and deaths often are), orâlike most profound, transformative changesâa combination of joy, sadness, excitement, anxiety, and gratitude. The intensity of such moments inevitably fades, creating a kind of grief that leaves us vulnerable.
We may be vulnerable to disillusionment, demoralization, or cynicism. Perhaps weâll never experience that closeness to God again; perhaps it wasnât even real. We may feel a loss of vitality, even a collapse of meaning. We may feel foolish for having believed. Or our vague sense of disappointment might manifest as retrenchment or fear. What if the transformative moment I felt was only momentary, and proves unsustainable? Perhaps nothing really changes at all. Things may feel too alien, or not different enough, or not different in the ways weâd hoped. Or the return of (or increase in) our quotidian responsibilities may feel like an affront to the holy: a moment ago I witnessed someoneâs first or last breath, I witnessed the sacredness and preciousness of life, how can I now just go back to work?
A quality of loss
Affecting our Content
As Trade had suddenly encroached
Upon a Sacrament.
The narrative of the Exodus from Egypt is a prime example. The Hasidic masters understood the exile in Egypt to be an experience of tumah ânot necessarily sin per se, but lifelessness, hopelessness, a culture of death and sameness. Our redemption from Egypt was an act of tehiyat hemetim, the raising of the dead, one of the three âkeysâ that the Talmud said God reserves for Godâs self. âThen Adonai took us out of Mitzrayim. Not by an angel. Nor by a seraph. Nor by a messenger. Rather, the Holy Blessed One, Godâs self, in Godâs glory,â our Haggadah reads. But the sense of the immediacy of Godâs presence fades. Immediately after they cross the sea, they grumble and complainâresentful, anxious, unsureââIs Adonai among us or notâ (). Tumah manifests again.
What are the consequences of this loss, this tumah? Among other things, when the Tabernacle or Temple stood, one who was tamei (impure) could not enter the holy precincts, until he or she was again purified. Perhaps this debarment was an external manifestation of the internal state: the exclusion from the Temple representing the loss of prior closeness with the Divine. Or perhaps there was a risk that in the wake of the immediacy of Godâs presence at a moment such as childbirth, even the holiness of the Temple service would pale in comparison.
Today, tumah has no practical consequence, but the Kotzkerâs insight serves as both warning and comfort for the life of the spirit.
The warning: the Kotzkerâs understanding of âimpurityâdoesnât entail immorality, but it does involve a vulnerability to error and sin. So in the let-down after intense moments, we would do well to be extra careful. We might be inclined to be self-indulgent, to shake off religious constraints, to succumb to laziness or carelessness. Alternatively, we might seek to recapture the lost âthrillâ through behavior that is morally or physically dangerous.
The comfort: this kind of tumah isnât something to be avoided at all costs, and itâs not a sign that something is wrong. On the contrary, the particular contexts the Kotzker singles outâgiving birth and contact with a corpseâare instances of tumah arising inevitably from a life of mitzvot. So too, vague disappointment or malaise are a natural part of the life of the spiritâhard to bear, but normal. May we be blessed from time to time with the immediacy of Godâs presenceâwith that light that âexists in Spring.â And when âit passes and we stay,â may we bear the resultant âquality of lossâ with renewed commitment.
This commentary was originally published in 2018.
The publication and distribution of the JTS Commentary are made possible by a generous grant from Rita Dee (łúâl) and Harold Hassenfeld (łúâl).
